


Not Even the Gods Above (Have It All Together)

by justyrae



Category: BBC Radio 1 RPF, One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Greek Mythology, Angst, Hand Jobs, Miscommunication, Multi, Polyamory Negotiations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-15
Updated: 2015-09-15
Packaged: 2018-04-20 22:08:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4804013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justyrae/pseuds/justyrae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Things can get a bit dicey when you've got three gods living under one roof.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Even the Gods Above (Have It All Together)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [generalllymild](https://archiveofourown.org/users/generalllymild/gifts).



> for the prompt: "an AU where Hades, Zeus and Poseidon aren't related. Louis as Hades, Liam as Poseidon and Nick as Zeus. everyone thinks they should just stop playing around get married already."
> 
> I sort of got carried away a few times and might've forgotten that they were supposed to be greek gods but I hope I did the prompt justice! (also feat. Niall as Hermes and Harry as Eros bc lbr deep down narry are meddlers)

"Bruce, I'm bored," Louis says as he taps Bruce's head and waits for his undivided attention.

He turns his head towards Louis and tilts it to the side as his jaw falls open and his tongue comes lolling out as he pants and Louis huffs. Bruce whines and lies down on the floor so he can roll onto his back and show his belly, and Louis leans forward to rub it.

"That's not helpful, you're supposed to be fearsome and terrifying y'know. This is bad for both of our images."

Bruce doesn't care; he just wants belly rubs.

He rolls over again onto his feet and pads over towards the door, turning his head back towards Louis and whining once he reaches it.

"Good idea," Louis says as he gets up from his couch. "Think it's high time we dropped in on Liam." He grabs Bruce's leash and fastens it to his collar. "It's been a whole day since last time, he's probably missing us something awful."

When Louis steps into the elevator and goes to press the button for Liam's floor, he hesitates for a second. He glances down at Bruce with a wicked smile and he's met with the same excited state.

"One pit stop first," he says, still grinning as the elevator doors close.

Being "the Unseen One" certainly has its advantages given that Louis breaks into his neighbors' flats on a semi-regular basis. He keeps telling Nick to get a better lock on his door, even though there's not a lock in the world that Louis can't pick.

It also helps that he, Nick, and Liam all live in the same building which makes it even easier for Louis to break into their flats whenever he likes. He'd still probably do it even if they lived in different parts of the city, he'd just complain about having to travel a lot.

It takes less than a minute for Louis to open Nick's door, and no more than five are spent in his flat before Louis is stepping back out into the hallway with Nick's dog Pig walking alongside Bruce. Louis steps back into the elevator and presses the button for Liam's floor, feeling even better than before.

*

Liam should really expect Louis to be in his flat when he comes home, seeing as how he does it nearly every day. He never locks the door behind him and he always leaves an absolute mess wherever he goes which means Liam has to spend at least an hour every night cleaning up after him.

But the absolute worst part of finding Louis in his flat without permission is also finding him without _clothes_.

"Louis!" he shouts as he quickly covers his eyes. He's bombarded by Bruce and Pig moments later with excited barking and excessive licking, forcing him to uncover his eyes so he can pet them properly.

"What?" Louis answers, hardly moving a muscle. "Didn't want to get my shirt dirty."

"That doesn't explain why you're not wearing trousers," Liam says, holding his hand up to cover Louis' bits from his view, "or _pants_."

"Been spending a bit of time with Harry lately," Louis continues casually, as though he's not starkers on Liam's couch eating a bag of crisps, "he may be shit with a lot of things but I have to say his views on clothing aren't half bad."

"He at least wears pants," Liam mumbles with a sigh. "Why're you in my house?"

"Your TV is better than mine," Louis replies as he stretches his legs and reveals even more of himself, making Liam blush so much that a light rain started falling from the sky outside and splattered against the window. Louis catches it starting out of the corner of his eye and smirks, he's got Liam right where he wants him.

No matter what anyone says, Louis' primary reason for goading Liam like this is to get a reaction that causes some sort of natural disaster. It has absolutely nothing to do with how Louis likes to see Liam's cheeks turn pink from embarrassment. He's simply trying to figure out just how far he can push Liam until he'll retaliate. Or until he floods the entire building again.

Either way, Louis isn't done with him yet.

"Lou, _please_ put your pants back on."

"I don't want to."

"Lou," Liam whines and stomps his foot impatiently, sending a shockwave through the flat that only makes the rain fall harder when Liam becomes embarrassed.

"Alright, alright," Louis huffs as he snatches his pants from the floor, "don't go and open a sinkhole under us just to get my pants back on."

"I didn't mean to--"

"You'd think you'd want my pants _off_ not on," Louis mutters, standing up and slipping them over his legs and snapping the waistband against his skin once he's covered himself. "Happy?"

"Yes, thank you."

Liam finally drops his hand to his side and sits down beside Louis on the couch, smiling as Bruce and Pig come over to lie down at his feet. Louis props his legs up, feet in Liam's lap, and lets out a huffy breath. Liam shakes his head as he puts his hands on Louis' legs and starts rubbing his thumb against Louis' anklebone, and Louis refuses to admit that he shivers.

He's just letting Liam think he's won for now. He's biding his time until the next opportunity to cause a bit of mayhem, that's all. They sit quietly for a few minutes before Liam realizes something and taps Louis' ankle.

"Why's Pig here?"

"I'm building an army of hellhounds," Louis replies plainly.

"And you're starting with Bruce and Pig?"

"Excuse you," Louis scoffs, "Bruce is ferocious and Pig's got potential."

Liam looks down at the two and they both stare back at him with wide eyes, looking more like they'd care for a nap than to carry out whatever ridiculous dastardly plan Louis may come up with. This isn't the first time Louis has talked about putting together an army; he comes up with some sort of army every other week. Liam looks back at Louis with an incredulous look and shrugs his shoulders, there's not really anything he can do to stop him.

"Nick's not going to like this."

Louis grins and grabs the bag of crisps he'd set aside earlier. "That's the whole point, innit?"

*

For all intents and purposes, Nick is a genuinely easygoing person. He tends not to get cross over meaningless things and is generally always in a good mood. That is until he gets home and sees a small river of water coming from under his front door and out into the hallway, and he knows exactly whose fault it is.

"Not again," he grumbles under his breath as he carefully steps over the flowing water and unlocks his door, hoping that perhaps it's not as bad as he fears on the other side.

It's worse: his flat is completely flooded because somehow all of his windows have been opened even though he's _positive_ they were closed when he left. There's also water dripping from the ceiling, so there's no question in Nick's mind as to how this happened. He looks around for any sign of Pig, normally she's come running over to him by now and the longer he goes without seeing her the more angry he gets.

After he's checked all the rooms - taking extra care to close and lock each window - and still can't find her, he stares up at the ceiling and shakes his fist at it as though that's going to fix everything.

"Tomlinson!" he shouts, and a crack of thunder booms so loudly that it's sure to terrify everyone in the building.

Everyone, that is, except one Louis Tomlinson.

Nick is absolutely seething when the elevator doors open on Liam's floor. It's a good thing that the door is unlocked when Nick tries the handle because otherwise he most certainly would've knocked it down, and that probably would've been quite costly to fix. Also he would've felt bad for destroying Liam's door in the first place since it's not exactly his fault that his flat is flooded and his dog is missing.

He's not sure what he was expecting to see when he stormed into Liam's apartment, but it certainly wasn't what he found.

Both Louis and Liam are absolutely soaked from head to toe and standing at the kitchen sink; from the looks of it Liam is desperately trying to get the faucet screwed back on so it stops spraying water everywhere while Louis just seems to be clinging to Liam's back and causing mayhem as per usual.

But the thing is... Louis is still only wearing pants, and Nick is not prepared for what he sees when Louis slides off Liam's back.

"What have you done?" he asks plainly, trying to keep his voice level through his frustration. He hasn't seen Pig yet, so there's no telling what else Louis has gone and made a mess of.

"It's nothing!" Liam shouts as he continues to struggle with the faucet. At the sound of Nick's voice Louis steps away from Liam and smirks as he turns to face Nick.

As much as he wishes he hadn't, Nick's eyes travel down Louis' body of their own accord and see the wet cloth of his pants clinging to the bulge underneath and suddenly Nick's throat feels very tight.

"Just a bit of fun," Louis says, crossing his arms as Nick quickly focuses on something - _anything_ \- other than Louis' dick.

"Where's my dog?" Nick asks through gritted teeth. He's thinking of cold showers, old men with wrinkly skin, his great aunt who smelled vaguely of mothballs and always had lipstick staining her teeth - just anything to keep himself from thinking sexy thoughts. The last thing he needed was to get hard around Louis.

It's unfortunately not the first time he's found himself in this particular predicament - though it seems to be occurring more and more lately. He doesn't find Louis unattractive - quite the opposite really - but Louis can be such a little _shit_ that Nick finds it hard to reconcile the part of himself that wants to bone Louis from the part that constantly wants to throttle him. It's quite the dilemma to have going on in one's head, especially when the object of their frustration is right in front of them.

Louis grins wickedly, which is another bad sign. Nick forces himself to ignore the droplets of water dripping down Louis' chest and the way it makes his own dick twitch in interest in his jeans in favor of adopting a severely unimpressed look and crossing his arms to mimic Louis. Maybe it'll piss him off and Nick can get the upper hand for once.

Louis whistles a quick tune Nick hasn't heard before, though it's hardly audible at all over the noise the kitchen sink is still making as Liam tries to fix what Louis has so obviously broken, but somehow both Bruce and Pig come running from another room and come to a stop by Louis' side. Nick thinks to himself that it's yet another bad sign that his dog pays better attention to Louis' commands than his own, but that's really nothing new.

"Pig," Louis says as he points at Nick and snaps his fingers, "kill."

"Don't set my own dog on me!" Nick shouts, but it doesn't matter anyway. Pig simply cocks his head to the side and stares at Louis with her tongue sticking out of her mouth. Bruce lets out a whine and lays down on the floor, nudging his head against Pig.

"Dammit, Pig," Louis mutters, "some hellhound you've turned out to be,"

"Oh for fuck's sake, Pig is not a hellhound!"

"That's what you think!" Louis shouts. "C'mon Pig, like we practiced! Kill!"

This time, Pig ignores Louis completely and turns her back to him in favor of curling into Bruce's side for a cuddle. Louis huffs loudly and deflates, crossing his arms again as he scowls at Nick.

"It's your bloody stupid dog's fault."

"Yes," Nick replies flatly, "it's my dog's fault she didn't attack me at your command, how awful for you."

"Ah-ha!" Liam crows from the kitchen, having finally fixed the sink so water is no longer spewing forth from the tap. He turns to face the other two and they both gulp audibly. Liam's white henley is clinging to his skin so tightly that his entire chest is on display, abs and all. There's not a soul in the world who wouldn't stare at that.

"Shit," Nick mutters, running a hand through his hair as he struggles to remember why he came up here in the first place. Dog, flooded flat, _right_. Things that are actually terrible that absolutely do not include drooling over Liam's six pack.

"Did I flood your place again?" Liam asks with a frown. "I didn't mean to, honest, it's just that..." he trails off and gestures to Louis. "He wouldn't stop."

"Why am I not surprised?" Nick sighs,

"What's that supposed to mean?" Louis scoffs.

"It's always your fault somehow, innit?" Nick shakes his head. "You're always causing mischief and ruining our lives one way or another."

"I beg your fucking pardon." Louis glares at Nick and advances so quickly that Nick is actually startled when Louis is suddenly right up in his space and jabbing his fingers against Nick's chest. "You are an unbelievable twat."

"Is that the best you can do?" Nick clicks his tongue as he pushes Louis' hands away. "Should've known a little thing like you can't hold your own."

"What did you call me?!"

They're soon shouting over one another, their faces inches away as they both say the most ridiculous and insulting things they can think of. Liam begs them to stop, he hates confrontation anyway but watching Nick and Louis fight like this is one of the worst things in the world. He starts getting flustered and upset, and when coupled with Louis and Nick arguing it's only a matter of time before a massive storm sounds like it's practically tearing the world apart outside.

The only thing that manages to stop them fighting is when the power goes out, but the silence only lasts for maybe ten seconds.

"This is all your fault."

"My fault?!"

"Yes, your fault!"

"You're the one who stole my bloody dog and flooded my apartment!"

"You made the power go out!"

"Stop! Please!" Liam shouts as he finally gets between them and a flash of lightning lights up his flat for a second. Their breathing is heavy but hard to hear over the sounds of the storm wreaking havoc outside, and neither Louis nor Nick can ignore how they feel having Liam's arms pressed against their chests.

Louis is the first to move, he grabs Liam's wrist and holds it tightly so he can't possibly pull it back. Even through the dark, he can see Liam's confused look and it makes an idea pop into his head.

"It's not my fault, Liam," he says sweetly. "Tell him."

"Lou," Liam warns, "don't."

"M'not doing anything," he continues, "I just think you should tell Nick _the truth_ about why his flat got flooded."

"I'm willing to bet you had everything to do with it," Nick answers, his chest still heaving under Liam's arm.

"He might've been the cause, but it's still my fault." Liam frowns sadly. "I'm sorry, I'll pay the damages, I swear--"

"Shit, Liam, you don't have to." Nick sighs. "It'll be fine, I'm sure."

"See? No harm done." Louis smirks and the next thing Nick knows he hears Liam yelp.

"Louis!"

"Louis," Nick groans, "what did you do?"

"Nothing."

This time Nick is the one who lets out a yelp, and it's because someone's hand comes into contact with his cock when he's not expecting it.

"Jesus!" he shouts, swatting the hand away. "You really are a bloody menace."

"I dunno what you're talking about," Louis says, and Nick can't quite tell but it sounds like Louis is moving. It's pitch black in Liam's flat with the power out, and Nick has to rely on his other senses to keep on his toes.

"Louis!" Liam says again, this time less frightened and more... well, Nick wouldn't exactly say _excited_ \- but then Liam lets out a moan and another flash of lightning reveals that Louis is pressed against Liam's back with his hands down Liam's trousers.

Nick swallows harshly. He wasn't expecting that.

The hand that was pressed against Nick's chest is now curling into his shirt as Liam lets out another moan and Nick feels weak in the knees. He puts his hand over top of Liam's and shuffles forward so he's standing in front of him, as far as he can tell in the darkness.

"Louis," Nick says slowly, "what're you doing?"

"Finishing what I started before you interrupted," Louis replies smugly and Liam lets out a whimper.

"You couldn't wait for me to leave?" Nick asks, aiming for put off but it's hard when his throat is dry and his own cock is starting to throb in his jeans.

"Leave if you want," Louis mutters, "nobody's stopping you."

Liam whines again and pulls on Nick's shirt as though he's trying to keep him in place with just one hand, Nick tentatively reaches out with his free hand until he cups the side of Liam's face and hums softly.

"Think someone is," he murmurs as he leans down and presses his lips to Liam's.

Nick's head is spinning; he has no idea how he managed to go from shouting at Louis to kissing Liam in minutes, but he's not about to stop. Especially not when Liam's other hand slips into his jeans and wraps around his cock while they keep kissing.

He can hear Louis panting behind Liam, and with the way their hips keep knocking into each other he can only imagine that Louis is grinding into Liam's arse with the same rhythm he's using on his cock. It's too much all at once and he finds himself close to orgasm before he knows what's happening and suddenly Liam's moaning into his mouth and squeezing his cock, and the next thing Nick knows he's coming in Liam's hand. He can pinpoint the moment Louis comes as well, breathing harshly until he cries out and practically knocks Liam into Nick as he slumps forward.

"Well..." Nick says as he clears his throat, "that was... unexpected."

"Yeah," Liam says with a breathy laugh as he slowly pulls his hand from Nick's jeans. Nick laughs as well and leans forward to give Liam another kiss. He finally lets go of Liam's hand and tries to reach around to touch Louis, only he's not there.

"Louis?" Nick says, still feeling around for him in the dark. "Where are you?"

The only answer he gets is the sound of the front door opening and slamming shut.

"What the fuck?" he says, and just then the lights come back on. He and Liam stare at each other in confusion until Pig whines, and then they both realize that Louis not only abandoned the two of them, but he left Bruce behind as well.

"But, he..." Liam shakes his head. "I don't understand."

Nick sighs heavily and runs his hands through his hair. He didn't understand Louis before, and now it's even more complicated.

*

Louis doesn't answer the door when Nick and Liam bring Bruce down to his flat. If the situation weren't so weird Nick would be proud of himself for predicting that Louis wouldn't open the door, but he's too preoccupied by the worried look on Liam's face as he keeps knocking.

The door swings open after the tenth knock and behind it stands Niall. Liam and Nick share a look before they stare at him in confusion. It's been barely twenty minutes since Louis ran out on them, it's baffling that Niall is somehow already there.

"Bruce!" Niall says happily as he takes the lead from Liam's hand. He steps forward and closes the door to Louis' flat behind him, leaving Liam and Nick even more confused than before. He nearly pushes through the two of them with the intent to leave, but Liam grabs his arm before he can get away.

"Where's Louis?" he asks with a frown.

"Dunno," Niall replies. "He asked me to take Bruce for the night, which I thought was weird since he wasn't inside but here he is!"

"Wait," Nick says as he catches Niall's other arm when he tries to leave again. "He's not in there?"

"Who, Louis?" Niall shakes his head. "Nope. Dunno where he is, actually."

"How'd you get in?" Liam furrows his eyebrows, continuing to be the most endearing boy in the world when he's confused.

"I've got a key, of course!" Niall laughs. "You alright? You both look weird."

"Weird how?" Nick asks, trying not to look at Liam on the off-chance that Niall figures out what's just happened between them.

"Dunno," Niall says as his laughter dies down and he gives them both a strange look. "Just... weird."

"Thanks," Liam mutters as he suddenly turns on his heel and heads for the stairs rather than the elevator. Nick whips his head back and forth between Liam and Niall for a moment before he gives Niall an apologetic smile and then runs after Liam.

He immediately regrets the decision when he gets inside the stairwell and Liam's already halfway to the next floor.

"Liam!" he calls, hoping Liam might just stop and he won't actually have to climb the stairs to go after him. Liam doesn't answer nor does he stop, and Nick groans softly before he starts taking the stairs two at a time to try and catch up.

He calls Liam's name again as he starts gasping for breath, cursing Liam for being in good shape and himself for not going to the gym more than two days a year but most of all cursing Louis for running away and causing this mess.

"Liam, please!" Nick groans as he comes to a stop, clutching at the railing for dear life. Liam finally pauses, turning around just enough to let Nick see the tears streaming down his face.

"Good night, Nick."

"What--" Nick can't manage to get another word out before Liam disappears up the stairs and leaves him all alone.

By the time Nick manages to drag himself back to his flat, he's too tired to deal with the water damage and can't even muster up the strength to be upset with Pig for getting his bed wet by running through the puddles before she curled up and fell asleep. He falls onto the bed next to her, grateful that for once she's not trying to take up all the space.

He grumbles nonsense under his breath, still cursing Louis. He shouldn't have to deal with this bullshit, it wasn't his idea to ravish Liam Payne in his kitchen. Not that he hadn't thought about it, because Liam was ridiculously fit and Louis had an uncanny way of making sure he was always soaked with water. And even though he drove Nick absolutely mad most days, Louis was well attractive too.

Nick sighs heavily as he rolls over to turn off the light and closes his eyes. In the silent darkness he can't help but wonder if this night was supposed to turn out differently; if there was some universe where he'd be falling asleep next to Louis and Liam instead of Pig.

*

Louis doesn't speak to Liam or Nick for a whole week. He barely even leaves his flat, having talked Niall into taking Bruce out for walks every day. Niall doesn't ask why Louis doesn't want to go outside or why he hasn't been bothering Liam and Nick as much lately, he just comes by every day to make sure Louis hasn't suffocated under a mound of garbage overnight.

Niall knows something is wrong. He didn't have to ask Liam or Nick that night, he could see it on their faces. He's well aware of the peculiar triangle they've found themselves in and used to find it funny that they all had their heads shoved so far up their arses that they couldn't see what was right in front of them. But now it's clear something has happened, and if Niall knows anything at all he knows Louis had something to do with it and now won't admit anything's wrong.

He won't press Louis for information, because he knows that won't do anything except make Louis shut _him_ out as well. He does, however, ask Harry to investigate.

If there's anyone who can get to the bottom of this absurd situation, it's Harry. And if all else fails then there's the fallback of using Harry's luck with making people fall in love to fix everything.

"I don't do that!" Harry insists.

"Yes, you do." Niall rolls his eyes. "You meddle in people's love lives all the time."

"I do not!" Harry huffs. "I just--"

"Whatever, will you do it or not?"

Harry slumps onto Niall's shoulder and sighs heavily. "They are stupidly in love, aren't they?"

"Reckon they are," Niall laughs, "can't imagine why, they're all mad."

"That's the beauty of it," Harry says with a smile. "Sweet, innit?"

"Yeah, yeah," Niall says as he pushes Harry's face off his shoulder. "Just get to your meddling, alright?"

"S'not meddling," Harry mumbles as he drags himself to his feet. He continues to mumble to himself as he lets himself out of Niall's flat, presumably to begin whatever plan he's concocted in his head to get everything back to normal.

When Niall gets to Louis' flat the following day, he's surprised to find Louis there. It's funny, because he shouldn't be surprised to see Louis in his own flat, but it's also rather sad because Niall can't comment on that when Louis looks a bit like he's been hit by a truck. Not to mention there's a bouquet of what Niall suspects were once roses on the kitchen table.

Now they're rotten and mangled as though someone quite literally choked the life out of them.

Upon closer inspection, Niall sees Liam's name scrawled across the card tied around the stems and he lets out a breath. This is going to be harder than he thought.

"Alright?" he says casually, pulling up a stool alongside Louis as he reaches for the box of Weetabix sitting on the counter. Louis shrugs one shoulder as he bangs his spoon against the walls of his bowl of cereal with far more force than necessary.

"Fine," he mutters. Niall nods curtly and stuffs his mouth full of cereal for lack of anything further to say. Bruce comes padding up to his side and noses against his leg, apparently eager for their daily walk and Niall can't really blame him.

"Want to come with?" he asks through his mouthful, trying not to spray crumbs all over the place.

"Nah," Louis says with a shake of his head. "Give those back to Liam, would you?" he asks, nodding to the dead roses as he slides off the stool and leaves the kitchen without another word.

Niall sighs as he hears the door to Louis' bedroom close and he looks down at Bruce.

"Harry's gonna have to do better."

*

What Harry does next isn't exactly better, but it doesn't really make things worse so Niall isn't sure what to make of it. When he comes to Louis' apartment the next day he finds Pig in the kitchen curled up with Bruce on his doggy bed and shards of what once was a CD scattered on the kitchen table. Niall spends a few minutes piecing it back together as well as rearranging the torn up note along with it just to find out that it was a mix from Nick.

At least, it said it was from Nick. Harry had the good sense to type out the tracklist and only write Nick's name in his handwriting.

"Pretentious twat."

Niall spins around to see Louis standing behind him holding a note of his own. He's wearing the same black shirt and joggers that Niall's seen him in all week and his hair is an absolute mess, but all Niall can concentrate on is the redness around his eyes. It breaks Niall's heart to see one of his best friends like this, knowing there's not much he can do about it.

Louis grimaces at the CD as he goes over to Pig and ties the note to her collar and then tugs on her lead so he can bring her over to Niall.

"Louis--" Niall starts, but Louis interrupts him before he can get anything further out.

"Take her back to her stupid owner," he says, and then promptly leaves the kitchen and shuts himself up in his bedroom again.

Niall looks down at Pig who cocks her head to the side and whines softly, and he pets her head. His fingers trace the edge of the note Louis has tied to her collar, but he doesn't try and open it.

He dutifully takes Pig back to Nick's apartment with Bruce at his side and waits for Nick to answer the door, hoping he's home because otherwise the rest of Niall's afternoon is going to be very difficult. Just as he goes to knock on the door for the third time in the past five minutes, he hears his name from the other end of the hallway and he turns to find Nick walking towards him with a confused look on his face.

"Why d'you have my dog?" he asks, closing his eyes and letting out an annoyed groan before saying, "did Louis dognap her again?"

"Not exactly," Niall offers with a nervous laugh as he hands over Pig's lead. "You see…"

"What's this?" Nick mumbles as he sees Louis' note on Pig's collar, ignoring Niall trying to explain in favor of opening the note. "Oh, brilliant. That's just great."

"What?" Niall asks as he leans over to see what Louis has written.

_you're a smelly hipster loser_

Niall closes his eyes and curses Louis under his breath; he's truly not making this easy.

"He's still getting you to do his dirty work, is he?" Nick says as he crumples up Louis' note and shoves it into his pocket. "Lazy dickhead."

"He's just…" Niall pauses for a moment, "lonely?" Nick stares at him and Niall winces; lonely isn't the right term for the current situation, no matter how accurate it may be overall. "Y'know, he's down there all by himself, and--"

"If this is his way of saying he wants me to come to him, he's got a funny way of showing it," Nick snaps and a loud crack of thunder startles Niall.

"C'mon," he says with a nervous laugh, "you know Lou, he's just--"

"Funny enough, I don't," Nick interrupts. "I thought I did, but I guess I really don't."

Niall deflates as he sees the hurt in Nick's eyes and all he can think is _Louis what did you do?_ Nick shakes his head as though he was thinking about continuing but thought better of it and gently pushes Niall out of the way of his door so he can go inside with Pig.

"See you around," he mutters sadly as he closes the door. Niall sighs as he looks down at Bruce and shakes his head.

"Don't look at me like that," he mumbles. Bruce noses at his hand and Niall gives him a pet. "C'mon."

*

Harry assures Niall that this time will surely work to get them at least _talking_ to each other, but Niall is still skeptical. He goes along with Harry's plan and takes Bruce out of Louis' apartment early enough that Louis is still asleep, and feigns confusion later in the day when he goes to pick Bruce up but he's already gone.

He promises to go out looking for Bruce and makes Louis swear that he'll stay in the flat just in case someone brings him back, even though the look on Louis' face makes Niall want to tell him Bruce isn't really missing and everything's going to be just fine.

In reality, Harry's already taken Bruce up to Liam's flat with an envelope attached to his collar. He and Niall meet up at the far end of the hallway of Louis' floor to wait for Liam to return Bruce and Niall's curiosity gets the better of him.

"What did you put in the envelope?"

Harry grins. "A picture of Louis' dick."

"What?" Niall laughs. "You didn't."

"I did!"

"Where the fuck did you get a picture of Louis' dick?"

"He sent it to me!" Harry says as he pulls out his phone and scrolls through until he finds the message from weeks before.

"Harry," Niall says flatly as he turns the phone to show him, groaning as he sees the picture. "I didn't actually want to see that!"

"You asked," Harry replies and Niall rolls his eyes.

"I don't even want to know how you got that in the first place," Niall mutters.

"It's a funny story, actually," Harry grins again and Niall groans, "we weren't sexting, Niall, shut up."

"I gathered that, since he sent it with 'suck on this you wanker,'" Niall says, "but I still don't want to know."

"Alright, fine," Harry says with a frown, "you never like my stories."

"Not when they involve our friend's dick."

"Liam would like it."

"That's because Liam has a genuine interest in Louis' dick," Niall replies, "I do not."

"What about mine?" Harry asks with a sly smile as he shifts closer to Niall.

"Shut up," Niall mumbles as he pushes Harry's face away, turning to hide his face so Harry can't see the blush on his cheeks.

Liam appears in the hallway a little while later, gently leading Bruce towards Louis' door. He waits for a moment before he knocks as though he's trying to build up the courage to do so. Niall finds Harry's hand and squeezes it, suddenly nervous about this all blowing up in their faces.

As it turns out, Niall was right to worry.

The moment Louis opens the door, he starts screaming angrily at Liam for stealing his dog and making him worry all this time. He then shouts at him for the roses he sent and the whole while Liam's just staring at him dumbfounded, unable to say a word in his defense.

"Just piss off, Liam!" Louis yells, shoving Liam backwards as he grabs Bruce and slams the door.

Liam stumbles but catches himself, backing up until he connects with the wall on the opposite side of the hallway. He slides down to the floor and buries his head in his hands as he starts to cry, and Niall and Harry immediately rush to his side.

"I don't…" Liam sobs, "I didn't, I would never steal Bruce!"

"It's not your fault," Niall assures him.

"And what roses?" Liam asks, "I never sent roses!"

"I told you this wouldn't work," Niall grumbles to Harry.

"I didn't think he'd react like that!" Harry says as he hugs Liam tightly.

"I don't understand," Liam says as he tries to get a grip on himself, "why doesn't he want to see me? I thought after…" he trails off and starts crying again into Niall's shoulder.

"After what?" Niall asks, "Liam, what happened?"

"I thought he wanted me," Liam whispers in-between cries, "I thought he wanted us, but he ran away."

It takes a few more tries before Niall and Harry learn the whole story, but a new plan is already brewing in Niall's mind by the time he and Harry have got Liam to stop crying and tucked away in his bed. Even though Liam's fast asleep from exhaustion, it's still raining like mad outside and Niall hates that he's had a part in doing this to Liam.

"We've just got to get them all together," he decides. "There's no other way to fix it."

"What if they just kill each other?" Harry asks.

"They won't," Niall assures him, pausing before he adds in a low voice, "I think."

*

Executing the plan is easier said than done, at least when it comes to Niall's part. They decide to shut them all up in Liam's flat because it would probably be easiest to get them all there rather than anywhere else, but when Harry bagsies getting Nick there it leaves Niall with trying to figure out how to get Louis out of his flat.

"I'm not fucking going anywhere," Louis remarks flatly when Niall asks him to come with him. He doesn't mention Liam or Nick, but it's clear that Louis isn't going to agree to anything easily.

He doesn't mean to lose his temper, but he's at the end of his rope.

"You are, because I'm fucking sick of this!" Niall yells. "You've been holed up in here for weeks feeling sorry for yourself because you think Liam and Nick rejected you!"

"How do you--"

"And instead of being a fucking adult and _talking to them_ , you've shut everyone out and scream at them to leave you alone, and you made Liam fucking cry!"

Louis looks shocked to learn this, and maybe it was a bit harsh to yell it out, but Niall's far past the point of caring. He needs Louis to get his shit together already and stop being such a baby about everything.

"I made Liam cry?" he asks softly, his voice cracking on the last word.

"Yeah, you did. What're you going to do about it?"

"I don't… I don't know." Louis tries to curl in on himself but Niall won't let him. He grabs Louis by the arm and starts dragging him out of the flat.

"That's not good enough," he mutters, grateful for once that Louis isn't fighting him back. "You're going to get your head out of your arse and fucking apologize."

Louis hangs his head as he follows Niall into the elevator and goes up to Liam's floor. He stays silent until they're right in front of Liam's door, and then he turns to Niall and starts pleading.

"I can't, I can't go in there, Liam's going to hate me, I can't--"

"You're going," Niall tells him, keeping one hand on Louis' arm as he opens Liam's door. He drags Louis inside to where Harry's already waiting, but Nick and Liam are nowhere to be found.

"In there," Harry says as he points to Liam's bedroom door. Niall drags Louis over, ignoring his continuing pleas to let him go as he throws the door open and shoves Louis inside before closing it quickly and wedging a nearby chair under the handle.

"Here's hoping this works," Niall says to Harry who crosses his fingers in return.

*

Louis stumbles as Niall pushes him into Liam's room and he just barely catches himself from falling onto the floor in front of Liam and Nick, who are curled up at the head of Liam's bed. Louis looks up at them and then immediately regrets it when he sees the hurt in Liam's eyes and the anger in Nick's.

"Louis," Liam says softly, followed by Nick repeating it in a tone filled with disgust.

He doesn't even know what to say. It hurts to see Nick holding Liam, consoling him when Louis knows it's all his own fault. He pushed them together in the first place and even more now with shutting them out.

Louis puts his hand out behind him and tries the door handle as he keeps his eyes on the floor, letting out a distressed whimper when the knob won't turn. He's stuck in a room with the two people he's been avoiding for days and he has no idea how to handle it.

"Fat lot of nerve you've got," Nick says as he gets off the bed. Louis looks up for a quick moment but drops his gaze again when he sees Liam try and reach for Nick. He thinks it's because Liam doesn't want him to go, not because Liam doesn't want to watch the two of them fight.

"Nick," Liam says, but it does nothing.

"No, I want to know why he thinks he's got the right to treat us like such shit," Nick snaps.

"M'sorry," Louis mutters, still staring down at his feet.

"It's okay, Lou--" Liam starts to say, but Nick interrupts him.

"No, it's not!" he shouts, "Liam, you can't just forgive him and pretend like everything's okay!"

"That's not--"

"Don't talk to him like that!" Louis shouts over Liam's reply.

"Don't shout at me!" Nick yells back.

"You started it!"

Suddenly Nick and Louis are inches away from each other, screaming in each other's faces while Liam looks on in horror. He buries his head in his hands as he pleads for them to stop over and over until he finds himself shouting as well, loud enough that it startles the two of them.

"Shouting at each other isn't solving anything!" Liam huffs loudly. "Both of you need to sit down and shut up until we can talk about this properly."

Both Nick and Louis grimace at each other but they don't start bickering again. They sit down on opposite sides of the bed and refuse to look at one another and Liam sighs. It's not much of a start, but it's honestly more than he was expecting.

Several minutes pass by with them sitting in silence, the air thick with tension between the three of them but nobody rising to the occasion to attempt to break it.

Louis ends up being the first to speak, if only for the fact that he's buried so deep within his own thoughts that he doesn't realize he's spoken aloud.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles, his mind stuck on a never-ending circle of blame aimed at himself.

"You should be," Nick replies and Louis stiffens.

"Nick," Liam says in a sad tone.

"He started it," Nick goes on, apparently ready to go off on another tangent as to how this whole situation is Louis' fault but Louis interrupts before he can continue.

"He's right," he mutters, "it's my fault. I did it, I went too far, I…" Louis' breath catches and he shakes his head. Liam shuffles forward and takes Louis' hand in his own even as Louis tries to pull away.

"It's okay, Lou," he says, "you can tell us anything."

"Can I?" he asks, sniffling loudly as he keeps his eyes fixed firmly on Liam's duvet.

"Of course," Nick answers, surprising him. He also shifts on the bed to get closer to Louis, reaching out a tentative hand to touch Louis' shoulder. "What happened was, well," Nick laughs softly, "it was unexpected, for sure, but not unwanted."

"I know," Louis clears his throat, "I know, you fancy Liam, I get it."

"No, well, yes, you twat, but…" Nick laughs again as though he can't quite believe he has to say this, "you're not so bad yourself."

"Thanks," Louis remarks flatly.

"When you're not stealing my dog. Or flooding my flat. Or--"

"Nick," Liam says warningly and Nick shakes his head.

"What I'm saying is, I fancy you both. Even if you drive me mad, Louis."

Louis feels his cheeks turn red but he can't bring himself to look at Nick, not yet. Liam squeezes his hand and Louis has to focus all of his energy on not crumbling into pieces.

"You're alright, I suppose," he ends up saying, and Nick laughs. They fall into silence once more and all Louis can do is concentrate on how fast his heart is beating.

He's waiting for Liam to say something, anything. Normally he can read Liam like a book but because he can't bring himself to look Liam in the eye it's as if everything he knows about Liam has vanished into thin air.

"I thought you didn't want me," Liam whispers softly.

Louis' head snaps up of its own accord, his body seemingly having forgotten that his mind was absolute in its mission to not look at Liam, and his heart shatters at the dejected look on Liam's face.

"I used to think you did, but then…" Liam took a breath, "seemed like you got what you wanted and then didn't want _me_ anymore."

"Liam," Louis' voice breaks, "no, that's not it at all."

"Then what is it?" Liam asks. "Because you only said that Nick fancies me, and you left us alone after…" He takes another deep breath. "I just want to know why you think we can't want you, too."

Louis remains silent for a long while, desperately trying to think of how to explain what he wants in a way that makes sense outside of his own head.

"We do, y'know. Want you, that is." Nick chuckles softly as he gently runs his fingers down Louis' back. "Made a right mess of us when you left."

Louis shivers. "Didn't think you needed me."

"Of course we do," Liam says as he squeezes Louis' hand again. "I wish you hadn't run off."

"Didn't know what else to do," Louis admits, "you were kissing and I was just _there_ and then--"

Louis gets cut off when Liam suddenly leans forward and kisses him. Louis just barely starts to kiss back when Liam pulls away, only to be replaced by Nick. Louis whimpers into Nick's mouth as he clasps Liam's hand to ground himself.

"We want you," Liam says, "can't you see that?"

"I…" Louis stammers, "I don't…"

"We need you," Nick goes on, "who else can I rely on to get Liam wet on a regular basis?"

"Nick," Liam scolds, but it brings a hesitant smile to Louis' face.

"Surely you can't blame us for wanting to see that," Nick says with a leer, "especially when Louis here ends up soaked as well."

"Liam just can't control himself," Louis finds himself saying with a smirk, taking both Nick and Liam by surprise.

"You always start it!" Liam says, stunned as he starts to blush madly.

"As Nick said," Louis says as he slides his free hand across the duvet onto Nick's thigh, "can't blame us for wanting to see."

*

"D'you think they've made up?" Harry asks. Niall looks up from the house of cards he's been working on for the last half an hour and shrugs half-heartedly.

"They've stopped shouting, at least."

"It's also stopped raining," Harry says as he tilts his head to look out the window. The storm clouds have dissipated and the sun's out, shining through the windows. "That's probably a good thing."

"Probably," Niall agrees as he carefully sets another card down. Not two minutes later, the entirety of the flat shakes from the force of a sudden earthquake and Niall watches as his entire house of cards falls apart in seconds.

He opens his mouth to curse but he jumps at the sound of a loud moan coming from behind the door to Liam's room and Harry bursts out laughing.

"Guess that means they've made up," Niall comments as he quickly gets up from the couch, "and that's my cue to get the fuck out of here."

"I think it's sweet," Harry says as he follows Niall to the door, snickering again when they hear another moan followed by _fuck yes_!

"You've got a funny definition of sweet, Harry." Niall opens the front door and gestures for Harry to go first.

"I'm a _romantic_ , Niall," Harry says, ignoring Niall rolling his eyes as he steps through the doorway.

**Author's Note:**

> [my tumblr](http://imlouisaf.tumblr.com)


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